Counting Our Wins, Not Our Losses
I am emotionally driven.
To assess things accurately, I need concrete data in front of me, essentially showing me how things are going.
I'm a tracker. I'm also the one who makes a list of "To-Dos" and includes the things I've already done simply for the satisfaction of crossing it off..
I'm a glass-half-empty type of a person, and I problem solve.
In my mind, things could always use improvement, tweaking. Efficiency is something to be achieved!
This also means that I never feel as though we've reached our full potential. However idealistic that is, a big dark cloud of uncertainty and worry tends to loom overhead, because, in my mind, situations and people can become projects that need work. Ah! That's vulnerability.
Being emotionally driven wreaks havoc on how I assess our successes! Basically, we are succeeding if I feel like we are? So does this mean that we aren't when I feel as though we aren't? This is just not true. But the flip side is true: we might be succeeding AND thriving even if I don't feel like we are at the moment.
Recognizing these tendencies of thought is Step One.
Step two is making a plan to acquire an accurate view of how we're doing.
- Prioritize values
What kind of atmosphere in our home do we want? At the end of the day, what one thing do I want to make sure happened?
- Think about what's working already
If I reflect long and hard enough, there are things that come to mind that are already working for us. For example, we all make our own breakfasts 90% of the time. Having a list helps keep everyone on track. Fridays are lighter work days. Sitting down and eating dinner together almost every night is special and is happening!
Despite thriving with a schedule, I've discovered that journaling what we've accomplished is even better. I have a plan set, and as I implement it, rhythms take shape. As we have important family conversations, and do games, and play with one another, I take note of those as "wins." For our own homeschool, in this season, where we live, I actually don't need to schedule "family time." Everyday is family time practically. Because having meaningful conversations is something we value, as well as playing games together, reading, playing music, making things----these are already priorities we value as a family, I spend less time formally scheduling those things into our plans. Rather, I journal them when they happen.
Counting our wins.
Currently reading together:
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